So Apple has put out a few dumb celebrity ads for the Siri thing on iPhone, and I would like to point out their absurdities. Disclosure: I own an iPhone 4 and a MacBook Pro, so I am not motivated by jealousy of the company or their products. It’s just that Apple seems hellbent on using their commercials to irritate me. Let’s break down each directive given to Siri by our famous friends, starting with Zooey Deschanel.
- “Is that rain?” Yes, as you clearly saw when you walked three steps toward your window, weirdo.
- “Let’s get tomato soup delivered.” Really, tomato soup? Who delivers that? Doesn’t everyone have like eight cans in the cupboard?
- “Remind me to clean up.” Right, because it’s not like it will be apparent every time you walk into the room that it still needs cleaning.
- “Play Shake, Rattle, and Roll.” I might let this pass, but I’m still not convinced people our age willingly spend much time listening to old-timey music.
Now let’s see what Samuel L. Jackson is up to.
- “Cancel golf today.” How about simply not going? Problem solved.
- “Find me a store that sells organic mushrooms for my risotto.” First off, I had to look up risotto—this is not the last time I will need to consult the dictionary during the ad. Secondly, I’m guessing any organic grocery store will suffice, and I’m further guessing you already know their whereabouts.
- “How many ounces in a cup?” A Google image search for “measuring cup” indicates nearly all of them—including yours probably—have this info handily printed on the side. The answer is 8.
- “Remind me in an hour to put the gazpacho on ice.” Okay, another weird food I had to look up, and this one looks pretty gross. Cold soup? Believe me, it will probably taste better if you forget about the ice.
Bottom line: these ads further demonstrate to me just how “useful” Siri can be. And don’t even get me started with Rock God.